Aug

4

Take the lead.

August 4, 2010 | Leave a Comment

By Karin ter Horst, a Dutch intern

A Nigerian woman is strong. She has always something to say and it isn’t easy to distract or to confuse her. She knows what she wants and she isn’t dependent on anyone. She walks on the streets by herself, in contradiction to me, a very independent woman of Europe!

A Nigerian woman does what she needs to do to reach her goals and she goes where ever she wants. Or is the reality different?

Last week I visited a training to promote the use of female condoms by women. The female condom gives women the opportunity to protect themselves for pregnancy, sexual transmitted diseases and HIV/AIDS. So it’s not any longer only up to men. A woman will be able to take the lead in contraceptive and family planning. Actually, to be honest, I was surprised.

Of course, I’m aware of the position of woman here and that’s different than in the Netherlands. But after four weeks of being in Nigeria I almost forgot that men and woman aren’t equal. What I already said, I had the idea that there aren’t issues where Nigerian women don’t talk about. In a relationship the men have the most power. He is the head, including the brains; the woman is only the body. Without a man she wouldn’t be complete. So out of this theory it would be logical that the woman is the one who takes initiative.

But in the real world, a man decides who would be his destiny and that’s all. I had the same experiences by myself. When a guy gives a compliment, there is the expectation that you appreciate it and would be available.

The training I visited was organised for Non-Governmental Organisations (NGO’s), so they can spread the knowledge to woman in the society. Most of the participating people belong in my opinion to the category of ‘strong Nigerian women’. The reactions were very interesting for me. Because at home most issues are normal and common to talk about, especially in a relationship.

It’s good to recognize that there are a lot of Nigerian people who have the passion to develop their country and also believe in a change. That’s the most important. Besides time. A lot of time.

Whatever, I can say that the discussed theory about taking initiative is not about me. I should never make a move to men, here in Nigeria. First of all, because I’m independent. And in my opinion I don’t need a man to feel complete. But the most of all because I’m leaving the country within two weeks and I will arrive in my little cold hometown. So even more opportunities for Nigerian women to make a move!

Jul

27

By Karin ter Horst, a Dutch intern

Again, I learned a lot in my second week in Nigeria. For instance, that’s not necessary to dance in the club at Saturday night; it’s also possible at Sunday morning in the church. Further I discovered that plantain is my new favourite food, especially when it’s around four in the afternoon. Besides I know now what ‘flashing’ means and what the relationship between men and women is.

Several times I made some analyses about the last topic. Maybe it was visible on my face that I was thinking about this brain breaking difficulty. Because some people were asking me what my opinion is about Nigerian guys when I was walking around on the domain of the University in Lagos. It were some people from a local television station who were making a documentary. I told them that I like guys. But in my opinion Nigerian guys like girls more. That was exciting information; I had to give an example.

Last weekend I couldn’t get into sleep because I missed my Internet connection to much. So one of my new Nigerian friends brought me to a bar for two hours of surfing and browsing on the World Wide Web. I only had to pay 200 naira’s while at that moment I should give everything for checking my mail. My friend had the great idea that he was made for some of my Dutch friends. He told me this based on two facebookpictures. I should send her a message to invite her to come to Nigeria and convince her of his great muscles. They would build a beautiful relationship and within two years they would be married. Maybe is Facebook the new way for finding your true love. Maybe.

I decided to give another example to the camera people, because my Nigerian friend is always watching local channels when he isn’t busy with finding his true love. I explained that guys here are very physically and they give a lot of compliments. I’m also thinking that guys have more power related to the girls in a relationship. I spoke some of the boys and one of them told me he had five girlfriends! I made some jokes about it, but I can’t imagine that. It isn’t something to be proud of. I think a girl or woman deserves more respect than that, how many compliments she also should receive.

Guys are very generous in giving compliments and Facebookinvitations. But spending phone credits is more difficult. That’s something I recognized. When I took my phone I saw six missed calls. I called everyone directly back, brave as I am. But I discovered that a lot of people just call you for two seconds as a sign you have to call them back. It’s called ‘flashing’. I felt ‘flashed’ indeed.

The most important lessons I learnt last week is that you have to ignore boys with four girlfriends and you have to pick up your phone within two seconds. Oh! And when you walk into an internet bar, it’s better to buy directly three hours. So you don’t have to upgrade every 30 minutes.

Again, I learned a lot in my second week in Nigeria. For instance, that’s not necessary to dance in the club at Saturday night; it’s also possible at Sunday morning in the church. Further I discovered that plantain is my new favourite food, especially when it’s around four in the afternoon. Besides I know now what ‘flashing’ means and what the relationship between men and women is.

Several times I made some analyses about the last topic. Maybe it was visible on my face that I was thinking about this brain breaking difficulty. Because some people were asking me what my opinion is about Nigerian guys when I was walking around on the domain of the University in Lagos. It were some people from a local television station who were making a documentary. I told them that I like guys. But in my opinion Nigerian guys like girls more. That was exciting information; I had to give an example.

Last weekend I couldn’t get into sleep because I missed my Internet connection to much. So one of my new Nigerian friends brought me to a bar for two hours of surfing and browsing on the World Wide Web. I only had to pay 200 naira’s while at that moment I should give everything for checking my mail. My friend had the great idea that he was made for some of my Dutch friends. He told me this based on two facebookpictures. I should send her a message to invite her to come to Nigeria and convince her of his great muscles. They would build a beautiful relationship and within two years they would be married. Maybe is Facebook the new way for finding your true love. Maybe.

I decided to give another example to the camera people, because my Nigerian friend is always watching local channels when he isn’t busy with finding his true love. I explained that guys here are very physically and they give a lot of compliments. I’m also thinking that guys have more power related to the girls in a relationship. I spoke some of the boys and one of them told me he had five girlfriends! I made some jokes about it, but I can’t imagine that. It isn’t something to be proud of. I think a girl or woman deserves more respect than that, how many compliments she also should receive.

Guys are very generous in giving compliments and Facebookinvitations. But spending phone credits is more difficult. That’s something I recognized. When I took my phone I saw six missed calls. I called everyone directly back, brave as I am. But I discovered that a lot of people just call you for two seconds as a sign you have to call them back. It’s called ‘flashing’. I felt ‘flashed’ indeed.

The most important lessons I learnt last week is that you have to ignore boys with four girlfriends and you have to pick up your phone within two seconds. Oh! And when you walk into an internet bar, it’s better to buy directly three hours. So you don’t have to upgrade every 30 minutes.

Jul

16

By Karin ter Horst

A story from a Dutch intern in Nigeria

Really, I couldn’t wait to open my inbox in my internet browser. I hadn’t used my laptop for a whole week so it took some time to starting up. I entered my password to log in and saw 81 new mails. Where to start?! I scanned quickly all the messages on my screen: mails from my Dutch friends who were missing me, photographs from my father and invitations for summer parties. Besides these messages there were also less attractive messages, like reminders for library books and bank accounts.

This was the first time I had access to the World Wide Web after one week staying in Nigeria. For me, it’s a new record! Never in my young life had I lived such a long period without Internet. Although I was busy with learning to eat Nigerian spicy food last week. Besides I also had to learn some Pitching English and a few African dance moves from students in Lagos. So actually, I didn’t have the time to think about using Internet or checking my Facebook. Maybe you think it’s crazy, but in the Netherlands I’m used to do it at least four times a day!

My whole life I wanted to visit Africa. This summer I got the chance to do a development internship in Lagos. So that’s the reason why this internet addicted Dutch girl came to Nigeria. In this country you have to pay for every minute you’re online. Normally I should take all the possible time to answer my messages and to upload some new photographs on my travelblog. But now I will be as fast as I can, because of my host family. I made a plan to read all these 81 mails. I decided to start with the most urgent mails. So I sended my dad a mail that I’m still alive in Africa.

In the Netherlands it’s normal that everyone has access to information and communication technology (ICT). Additional you can use broadband Internet for a standard amount a month. That makes it’s possible to search, learn, shop and communicate on your personal computer (PC) or laptop: at office, home, school and university, wherever you want. Nowadays there are a lot of people who are using the Internet on their laptop or mobile phone when they are travelling. Children with the age of four years are already playing educational games on the PC and young people build their social networks by chatting and social media, for instance Facebook. Another possibility for foreigners, for example, is to call with family in other countries with Skype. Internet makes the world smaller and accessible.

The man was head of the family and was all day working, that’s what the traditional roles were in a Dutch family, 50 years ago. Women stayed at home to take care of the children and to clean the house. Nowadays, the most Dutch women have a job also, mainly part-time. It’s normal to go studying after primary school. Both, for boys ánd girls. To be honest, girls finishing their university in average earlier than their male fellow students.  For so far the access and use of ICTs is the same for boys and girls to raise their goals. But one thing has to be said: Boys will spend more time on online gaming.

Then, my time was up, I had to turn off my laptop. The Korean girls who were also staying at the host family really wanted to chat with some friends in South-Korea, so they were waiting. But I forgot almost the most important thing: my mail inbox from the university. So the last thing I did was checking if I received some results of exams by mail. That wasn’t the case, the only thing I received was a message that I should order my new books for next college year. But that’s an issue to worry about later. First I will enjoy Nigeria. With or without Internet.

Mar

8

International Women's Day 2010 Logo

International Women’s Day (8 March) is a global day celebrating the economic, political and social achievements of women past, present and future.

The theme for this year’s celebration is Equal Rights, Equal Opportunities: Progress for all. Let’s use this day and week to ponder on how far women have come but yet how far we still have to go. Let’s also identify how we can continue to support gender equity and equality.

The International Women’s Day website lists events taking place around the world to commemorate the day.

W.TEC is organising a workshop to celebrate the day and the International Women’s Week, which will feature talks from women leading organisations that are doing cutting-edge and pioneering work to uplift Nigerian women and girls.

How are you spending the day?

Jan

6

ASMAF Scholarship Info

This is the type of wonderful news that we love to share!

The Ajesola Solarin Majekodunmi Foundation (ASMAF) is offering scholarship opportunities for Nigerian female students who will be starting university for the first time and cannot afford to pay the fees.

Requirements:
- Student must have gained admission for a professional course like Medicine, Engineering, Law, Architecture, Accountancy, Actuary, etc in a public Nigerian university
- Must demonstrate academic and professional excellence and leadership

Deadline for Application: 29 January 2010

To apply, submit a copy of your resume. For more information, visit the ASMAF website or the organisation secretariat at 47 Tejuosho Road, Surulere, Lagos.

Dec

10

By Omokemi

Educating an individual amount to giving legacy to a generation. The need to increase literacy among the Nigerian woman cannot be over emphasised especially at a period when the literacy level in Nigeria is reducing. In order to increase literacy and economically empower the Nigerian woman, W.TEC offer a number of programmes for girls and women. Example of such programmes are W.TEC  ICT Programmes for Young and Older Women

W.TEC ICT Programmes for Young and Older Women

1.             These give women new skills and a stronger position in the labour market (in line with the provisions of Article 10 of CEDAW which talks about the woman’s right of access to education, information technology and skills).

2.             The ICT trainings provided a source of living to participants after the programmes which has helped to reduce the feminine face of poverty and has increased the women’s access to property, land and financial credit facilities such as bank loans, and mortgages.

3.             The programmes have reduced domestic violence. Some of the women are now gainfully employed and so are also contributing their own quota to the home front which has earned them some respect from their spouses.

In 2009, 97 women benefited from the programmes. The number however, represent a very small fraction of women reached out to in a country that is up to 150 million population. As the 16 days of advocacy against violence on women comes to an end today, mark the event with an action. Do something in your little way to liberate a disenfranchised woman.

Donate to W.TEC ICT programmes forYoung and older women. Your gift of N5,000 ($33.35), N50,000 ($333.35), N500,000 ($3333.35), is greatly appreciated and will enable us continue with her work.

Be sensitised on the right of a woman, say no to violence against women.

Dec

9

By Oreoluwa

Grace Ushang Vigil & March - Dec 4, 2009

Grace Ushang Vigil & March - Dec 4, 2009

As we wrap-up this year’s 16 Days Campaign against gender violence, it’s important to identify steps to advance this cause.

Last Friday’s march to protest the rape and murder of youth corper Grace Ushang was an excellent step in raising awareness about not only this incident, but all the other thousands of assaults that take place daily and go unreported. Efforts like this also provide a space for women and advocates against gender violence to get together, support each other and propose progressive measures.

At the march and vigil, protestors made the following recommendations:
- To take measures to guarantee the safety and personal security of youth corps members and indeed all women and girls who remain vulnerable due to impunity amongst perpetrators in Nigeria;
- To pass the Bill on Violence Against Women presented to the House of Representatives since April 2002;
- To adopt and pass the Harmonised Bill on Violence Against Persons (Prohibition) Bill 2008 presented to the Senate through its Committee on Judiciary, Human Rights and Legal Matters in July 2008;
- Appropriate funds to facilitate the establishment and equipping of units in all divisional posts of the Nigeria Police Force to enhance the investigation and prosecution of cases of violence against women, thereby enhancing accountability and access to justice for women who suffer abuses in private and public spaces;
- Commit a full scale investigation to bring the killers of Grace Ushang to justice.

The last is crucial, because after the initial outcry, the incidences fade from the public’s memory and justice is either intolerably slow in coming or permanently deferred. Last year’s attack of Uzoma Okere by a naval rating is a perfect case in point. Thankfully though, the court case is still in process, despite delay tactics from the defendants’ lawyers.

It’s important that each of us thinks about how we can help eliminate violence against women. For a start, supporting bills and other legal instruments that seek to provide additional protection to women is a good start. We can participate in events and gatherings like the vigil and march in honour of Grace Ushang and mobilize others to do the same, as our physical presence – especially in large numbers – shows solidarity and makes a greater impact than we imagine. We can individually challenge thinking and cultural mores that permit violence against women through discussion and action.

It’s not always easy, especially within cultural contexts that view these issues of violence benignly or even actively encourage them. We might not all think ourselves capable of ‘putting ourselves out there’ but perhaps you could find small but important actions to take. The struggle to eliminate gender violence requires all our efforts and should not be left to those considered the ‘heavyweights’ of women’s rights. This is a continuous struggle and should not be consigned merely to these 16 days of each year.

Dec

8

By Omokemi

Violence against women is any violence that targets a woman because she belongs to the women’s fold.  Violence against women includes ill treatment of female househelps. A family hired the service of a 15 year old girl as househelp. Madam travels often and so few weeks after the househelp came to the house, Oga succeeded in engaging her in a sexual affair. Oga’s 17 year old son caught his father in one of the acts and threaten to tell his mother unless the househelp allows him also to have rounds with her. Both father and son continue in sexual affair with the housemaid until the girl became  pregnant and both men denied being responsible.

How do you treat that little girl in your care? Remember she is a potential mother like your female children. Do you wish her a  bright future like your children? Remember what goes around comes around. It is what you do to children in your care that outsiders will do to your children. Be sensitised on the right of a woman. Say no to violence against women.

Dec

6

By Omokemi

Once a man carries out all necessary marriage rites and the woman start living with him, he may find it extremely difficult to continue regular visits to his in laws’ place while he expects his wife to be consistent with her visits to his parents’ place.

He may feed his relations regularly with issues coming up between him and his wife even when such issues are supposed to be the couple’s secrets.

He brings minor disagreements at the home front before his relations who readily paint the wife bad and ungrateful.

The cause for the birth of female children is placed on the woman, who is also blamed for being an obstacle to the man’s progress because half of money demanded for housekeep, if saved could have been used by the man to build a house.

His relations believe, he would have been better off, if he had married a woman from his hometown.

Does the above portray the way you treat your wife/sister in law and present her to your family? Be sensitised on the right of a woman. Say no to violence against women.

Dec

5

By Oreoluwa

BAOBAB For Women’s Human Rights  is another non-governmental organisation making great strides in advocating and protecting women’s rights. Like Project Alert, BAOBAB actively documents their work, believing that information and statistics are crucial in emphasising the gender inequalities that exist in our society and in presenting strong arguments for the importance of safeguarding women’s rights.

However, while Project Alert’s support services are a prominent part of their programming, an integral aspect of BAOBAB’s work is the focus on the intersection between the law and human rights.

BAOBAB focuses on women’s legal rights issues under the three systems of law in Nigeria: customary; statutory and religious. BAOBAB’s stated mission is “to promote women’s human rights principally via improving knowledge, exercise and development of rights under religious laws, customary laws and statutory laws.”

It sets out to achieve these through its 4 working groups:

The Research and Capacity Building group conducts research, documents findings and builds capacity in different areas, based on the identified needs of women in particular. This includes the Women and Laws Project, workshops and conferences, legal literacy leaflets, and internships.

The Information, Communication, Education and Networking group coordinates the information sharing between BAOBAB and its stakeholders and includes the BAOBAB newsletter, general alerts, formation and management of coalitions and information services to NGOs.

The Peace Building, Interpretation of Laws and Legal Defence group addresses background and conceptual issues regarding women’s human rights in religious laws and how interpretation of laws affects women adversely. It also aims to provide platforms for discussing women’s human rights issues, to develop appropriate intervention strategies to bridge the gap of understanding of these issues, to mediate in violence against women cases in both private and public spheres and provide counselling support to survivors.

The Mobilization and Advocacy group sensitises communities on issues that affect women and prevent them from actualizing their potential in different spheres. This work includes the formation and coordination of community-based outreach teams, legislative and social Advocacy through international and regional treaties to protect and promote women’s human rights, e.g. CEDAW, engendering the police, judges and legislature, and participating in advocacy solidarity campaigns like the “16 Days Activism Against Gender-Based Violence.”

Learn more about BAOBAB’s work at their website: http://baobabwomen.org

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